Warren Wiersbe said, “A realist is an idealist who has gone through the fire and been purified. A skeptic is an idealist who has gone through the fire and been burned.”

Do you know what the difference is? It’s not the fire, or the heat or the duration. It’s the attitude you bring into it. When you look back on life’s unpleasant events, you can choose to see what you learned from the ordeal, or you can choose to just see it as a bad experience.

In every trial, every problem, every difficult situation, God is seeking to teach us something new, he’s seeking to take us to a higher place. Maybe it’s a chance to exercise a bolder faith, maybe it’s a chance to identify bad behavior that we must abandon, maybe it’s an opportunity to practice perseverance.  The lesson is always there in difficult situations; we can choose to be purified and made holy, or we can just allow ourselves to become burned and bitter.

Daniel wrote, “Many will be purified, cleansed and refined by these trials. But the wicked will continue in their wickedness, and none of them will understand. Only those who are wise will know what it means.” (Daniel 12:10)

One of my favorite movies of all time is The Godfather. One of my favorite sitcoms from the old days is Barney Miller. The common denominator in these two is Abe Vigoda. Abe Vigoda has been playing an old man longer than he’s actually been one; he was only in his early 50′s when he played the soon-to-retire Sergeant Fish.

In 1982, People Magazine reported that he was dead. In 1987 a news reporter referred to him as “the late Abe Vigoda.” Vigoda took the false reports in stride. It has become a running joke, and Abe often takes part in it on shows such as Conan OBrian and David Letterman. There’s even a website, AbeVigoda.com, that lists his current status as dead or alive.

In spite of the fact that many people think he’s passed on, Abe Vigoda just keeps going. He’s 88 now, and he’s still working.

When Nehemiah was rebuilding the wall in Jerusalem, there were many who said that Nehemiah was the wrong leader and that his ambitious project was doomed from the start, but Nehemiah kept working.

Paul’s critics misrepresented his doctrine and celebrated his incarceration, and yet Paul kept on preaching, kept on writing letters, kept on serving churches.

From time to time there might be one or two who are ready to pronounce you, or your ideas, or your ministry, dead on arrival. There’s only one way to prove them wrong. Take it in stride. Keep showing up. Keep plugging away. When you get knocked down, get back up. It’s not what anyone says that matters, or even what they think that matters. It only matters what you do.

We need to remember the words of Paul: Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ. (Galatians 1:10)

Former IBM president Thomas Watson once said, “To be successful, you have to have your heart in your business, and your business in your heart.” As true as these words are in the corporate world, they are even more so for the life of the ministry. Your job makes sense only when your heart is fully engaged. Otherwise you’ll eventually decide that the sacrifices, the long hours, the undeserved criticism, the low-pay, and all the other fringe benefits that come with your calling just aren’t worth it.

How do you put your heart in your work? By remembering that the result of our good work isn’t just a bigger crowd on Sunday or a well-organized church picnic or a well-deserved raise in pay. The result of our good work is changed lives that reap the benefits of eternity.

For this reason we need to remember the words of Paul…

Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is seated at the right hand.

It only makes sense that he says next …

Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. (Colossians 3:1-2)

There is a close connection to what we think about and what we feel, a close connection to what we think about and what we want. Focus on the eternal results of your work, not the temporary frustrations. This will help you set your heart and your mind on things above.

Do you want more self-discipline? Put a book on your head. It works, according to Roy Baumeister, a social psychologist at Florida State. In his book Your Own Worst Enemy Baumeister reports that students who practiced walking with a book on their head (to improve posture) ended up eating better, studying harder, and sleeping more — without specifically focusing on making these improvements.

Baumeister’s theory of self-improvement is that small improvements pave the way for big improvements. As leadership coach Penelope Trunk says, “Self discipline snowballs.” If you can work hard to get disciplined in one area, you can discipline yourself in others more easily.

Maybe that’s why Paul said, “I buffet my body and make it my slave…” (1 Corinthians 9:27). He knew that gaining control over one area can help us gain control over another.

If you want to develop self-discipline, and (like most people) you have a number undisciplined areas to choose from, start with the easiest, not the toughest. Put the proverbial book on your head and start walking straight. — SM

I got off the plane, got into my rental car, and began driving around a city I thought I knew. After a few blocks of turning this way and that, seeing none of the places I expected to see, I was thinking I might be lost.  Another 15 minutes and I was sure.

I called my son, who was expecting me later in the day, and explained my predicament. He asked where I was and I confessed that I had no idea, but assured him that eventually I would find my way out. He said, “Too bad you didn’t think to rent a car with GPS.”

It was one of those ‘duh’ moments. My car did come with a portable GPS unit, but it was still in the glove compartment. I hadn’t even thought of it. I pulled over, plugged it in, entered the address I was looking for, and within a minute a friendly voice in the little box was directing me to the right place. I actually doubted the directions a couple of times, but it turns out that the GPS knew the way better than me. Eventually I heard the words, “Arriving at destination on left…”

It reminds me of what we so often do. We think we know how to get where we want to go, but get lost with our own dumb decisions. Then we get even more lost with even dumber decisions. All the time we have a place we can go for directions, but for some reason we neglect to look.

The Lord says, “I will guide you along the best pathway for your life. I will advise you and watch over you.” (Psalm 32:8)

God has promised to guide us step by step through this journey, through our relationships and through our careers and through our finances and through our personal lives. He speaks to us through his Word and through the wisdom of spiritual leaders. Too often we neglect to listen, preferring to keep making wrong turns instead.

If you’re feeling a little lost in some areas of life, and the turns you take keeping leading you where you don’t want to be, stop for a moment today, and open your heart to his voice. Let his Word direct you to the next step you need to take. He will guide you along the best pathway for your life.

American author Iving Kristol said, “Being frustrated is disagreeable, but the real disasters of life begin when you get what you want.”

This is because what we want — or what we think we want — is so often not what we really need in order to live a fulfilled, meaningful life. There comes a time when we realize that the trinket we worked so hard to aquire, or even the goal we sacrificed so much to reach, doesn’t bring the satisfaction we expected it could. We then find ourselves asking, as so many have, “Is that all there is? Is this as good as it gets?”

Goals will always have a place in our lives, and accumulating possessions will always be part of the human experience, but we serve ourselves best the sooner we understand that these things will never be enough. We serve ourselves best when we are learn, as Augstine said, “Our hearts are restless, until they rest in thee.”

Where are you seeking your rest today? In a paycheck? In a relationship? In a status symbol? In a measure of success? These things may not be the enemy — they’re not bad in and of themselves — but it’s important that we understand that they’re not the finish line, either. If your heart is restless today, take a moment to re-evaluate what you really want. Strive to say, as David said, “My soul finds rest in God alone.”

Pringles. They’re potato chips, right? Depends on who you ask. According to Proctor and Gamble, they’re savory snacks. Why the distinction? Because in the UK, potato products (including potato chips) are taxed, other types of food products aren’t. It made sense then, financially speaking, for P&G to claim that Pringles aren’t chips after all. They’re just snacks.

Britain’s Supreme Court wasn’t fooled. They declared that Pringles — which consist of more than 40% potato flour — are, in fact, chips. And being potato chips, Pringles now owes about $160,000,000 in taxes. Of course, I don’t suppose you can blame P&G for trying.

The truth is, we try to do the same thing. We spin bad habits in order to justify bad behavior. The workaholic calls himself committed. The perfectionist says he has high expectations. The tyrant claims to be a great leader. The man with a brutal temper claims that he is intense. The miser claims he’s frugal. The greedy man claims he’s driven. The bully says he’s assertive. The lazy man calls himself laid back. And so on.

Shakespeare said, “That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet.” And that which we call a potato chip by any other name still tastes something like a potato. And any other name we give to sinful behavior still does the damage that only sin can do.

Paul wrote to Titus, “Remind the people to be subject to rulers and authorities, to be obedient, to be ready to do whatever is good, to slander no one, to be peaceable and considerate, and always to be gentle toward everyone.” (Titus 3:2-3)

He saying that we need to do good and do it in a good way. Let’s not try to repackage hurtful attitudes, pretending they’re actually virtues. Let’s be honest with honest with ourselves and with others, and seek to do good in a good way.

Anatole France once said, “Nine tenths of education is encouragement.” The same can be said for preaching, with a slightly different percentage; according to Paul, 33% of preaching is encouragement. He said, “But everyone who prophesies speaks to men for their strengthening, encouragement and comfort.” (1 Corinthians 14:3)

This applies to our conversations, as well.

Here’s my point. We need to check the content of our sermons (and our conversations) to see how much time we spend encouraging others, as opposed to how much time we spend pointing out their sins, or complaining about how bad things are, or warning about how bad things will get, and so on.

People need encouragement.

So, what is it? What does it look like? According to various online dictionaries, it can be defined as:

-contributing the progress or growth of someone or something.
-the expression of approval or support.
-to motivate, incitement to action or practice.
-to give hope or courage to someone.

You could say that encouragement is telling someone what they most need to hear in order to take the next right step.

The sermons (and conversations) that I find most encouraging are the ones  that remind me that God’s mercy is always more powerful than my sin, and there is no situation beyond his ability to restore, and that restoration can begin today if I start taking action today.

The sermons (and conversations) that I find most encouraging are the ones that remind me that holiness isn’t an unattainable goal, that becoming like Christ isn’t beyond my grasp, that it’s the birthright of every believer — including me — if I will only start taking steps in that direction.

All of our sermons (and conversations) should have an element of, “You can do it. Here’s how.” Whether we’re behind the pulpit or just talking to a friend one on one, we’re called to be voices of encouragement.

You probably already know most of Johnny Cash’s story. He became famous in the fifties at the same time as Elvis and Jerry Lee Lewis. While his career sky rocketed, his personal life bottomed out: he nearly destroyed himself with drugs and alcohol.

In the late sixties he gave his life to Christ, gave up drugs, and married June Carter. A couple of years later his son, John Carter Cash, was born.

Johnny Cash was determined not to repeat the mistakes that he made with his four daughters. One significant change was that Cash spent a lot of time with his son. He took John on the road with him. When they were home, he took him fishing. When John became an adult, father and son worked together in the studio, and they wrote songs together. They were, in Johnny’s words, “like soul mates.”

Johnny Cash will always be remembered as a legend in country music. But when he was once asked how he would like to remembered, he simply said, “I’d like to be remembered as a good daddy.”

Paul tells us, almost in passing, what it means to be a ‘good daddy.’ Here’s how the Message says it…

With each of you we were like a father with his child, holding your hand, whispering encouragement, showing you step-by-step how to live well before God, who called us into his own kingdom, into this delightful life. (1 Thessalonians 2:11-12)

That’s the process of being a good dad. It involves some hand-holding, some whispered encouragement, and some step-by-step teaching. Dads, here’s to meeting the challenge.

If you’ve ever watched football on TV, you’ve probably seen Referee Ed Hoculi. He’s easy to spot; he’s the one with the big arms.

He’s also one of the most accurate referees ever to work the game. Each week, the NFL invests 8 hours per game analyzing each official’s performance on each play. Every play earns a grade; the highest scoring officials work the post season; the consistently low-scoring officials don’t last long in the league. Ed has always scored among the top.

Again, if you’re a football fan, you know what I’m leading up to. Last September, in the final minutes of a game between the Denver Broncos and the San Diego Chargers, Hochuli made one of the worst calls of his career. When Denver quarterback Jay Cutler fumbled the ball, Hochuli blew the whistle and called it an incomplete pass. He knew it was a mistake the minute he made it, but there was nothing he could do; an inadvertent whistle is a non-reviewable, non-reversible call. Instead of San Diego getting the ball, Denver was allowed to keep it. They scored a couple of plays later and won the game.

Needless to say, the San Diego fans were furious. They all but called for Ed Hochuli’s head on a platter. Many wanted him fired and banned forever from the NFL. His office in Phoenix was flooded with angry calls. His Blackberry was jammed with angry emails.

Ed’s response to the mistake, first of all, was to admit it immediately to San Diego coach Norv Turner. He walked to the Charger sideline, told Turner that he had made a bad call, he apologized, and explained that there was nothing he could do about it.

Ed also told the San Diego Union-Tribune that week, “Affecting the outcome of a game is a devastating feeling. Officials strive for perfection — I failed miserably.”

And then, Ed began responding to those angry emails, one by one. His response amazed people, resulting in even more emails — upwards of 20,000 — many from fans thanking him for owning up to his mistake. Ed said, “People were saying how great it was that I admitted I made a mistake. Obviously, I was wrong. Obviously, I felt terrible about it. What’s so surprising about it?”

The best thing a leader can do is own up to a mistake. It’s the best thing a father or mother can do, a coach or boss. Or a pastor. It’s the only way to earn back credibility. It’s also the best way to build accountability.

James said, “Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.” (James 5:16)