Monday Memo

by Steve May

Fulton J. Sheen wrote:

“An interesting phenomenon in children is that gratitude or thankfulness comes relatively late in their young lives. They almost have to be taught it; if not, they grow up thinking that the world owes them a living.”

A friend once told me that she didn’t want to force her son to say “Thank you” unless he really felt like it saying it. She said, “If I teach him to say ‘thank you’ when he doesn’t feel thankful, I’m teaching him that it’s OK to be a hypocrite.”

That’s not even close to what gratitude is. Our feelings have nothing to do with why we express it. Gratitude is not an emotion, it’s an action. The act of saying “thank you” is for the benefit of the other person. It’s about their feelings, not yours.

The same is true when it comes to saying “Thank you” to God. Thankfulness is the proper response to the goodness of God. We say “thank you” because he is good, not just because we happen to feel good at the moment.

This is why the Psalms so often refer to the “sacrifice of thanksgiving” — it’s an act of obedience, not just an emotional outburst.

David said, “I will offer to thee the sacrifice of thanksgiving, and will call upon the name of the Lord.” (Psalm 116:17)

Like children, believers need to learn how to be thankful. Most of the time, when we consider all the good things God has done for us, we’ll feel thankful. Even when our feelings don’t cooperate, we need to properly express gratitude, offering God a sacrifice of thanksgiving for the kindness and mercy he has shown us.

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A grandmother was watching her grandchild playing on the beach when a huge wave comes and takes him out to sea. She pleads, “Please God, save my only grandson. I beg of you, bring him back.” And a big wave comes and washes the boy back onto the beach, good as new. She looks up to heaven and says: “He had a hat!”

That’s gratitude for you, isn’t it? Have you noticed that some people just can’t be satisfied? Some people — and I’m talking about you and me, not someone else — have a hard time expressing gratitude. Or even feeling it.

In 2001 Stephen Post, a medical school professor of bioethics, created a research group called the Institute for Research on Unlimited Love, dedicated to testing and measuring the effects of love, gratitude, and other positive caring emotions in human life.

Dr. Post’s research has discovered that spending 15 minutes a day focused on things you’re grateful for can have the following effects on our physical health:

1. It increases your body’s natural antibodies.
2. It increases mental capacity and reduces vulnerability to depression.
3. It creates a physiological state of “resonance”, improving your blood pressure and heart rate.

That’s gratitude for you, really. It not only lifts up the recipient, it also gives life to the one expressing it. This is why we’re told time and time again in scripture to give thanks: A thankful heart puts us in right alignment with God and one another.

Paul wrote, “And always be thankful. Let the message about Christ, in all its richness, fill your lives. Teach and counsel each other with all the wisdom he gives. Sing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs to God with thankful hearts. And whatever you do or say, do it as a representative of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through him to God the Father.” (Colossians 3:15-17)

Today, I encourage you to look for something … and someone … to be thankful for. Take a moment to feel it, and another moment to express it.

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Patrick Henry, who’s primary contribution to the history books is the phrase “Give me liberty or give me death,” made another statement that appears in a number of quotation collections.

He said, “I know of no way of judging the future but by the past.”

Repeat this before an audience and you’ll see many heads nod in agreement. It has the ring of good common sense.

Be careful, though. This axiom might be true when applied to politics or history or investing, but it provides a lousy foundation for developing relationships. And it certainly doesn’t reflect the way God relates to us.

God gives a chance to let go of the past and start over — each and every day. Jeremiah wrote, “Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.” (Lamentations 3:22-23)

God doesn’t judge our future by our past. He didn’t do it with David or Moses or Peter or Paul or countless other Bible characters. He does not treat us as our sins deserve. [Psalm 103:10] Every day is a new day.

A good way to start the day with God is to remember that you’ve just been given brand new mercies — the chance to start the day with a clean slate.

It’s also a good way to start the day with others. God doesn’t all our past to prevent us from a having a great future, so let’s give the same gift to others.