There’s a great story that’s been told about George and Barbara Bush. They were on the campaign trail and stopped to pull over for a tank of gas. The attendant happened to be an old high-school sweetheart of Barbara’s. George later remarked, “Just think. If you had married him, you’d be the wife of a gas-station attendant.”
Barbara replied, “George, you’re confused. If I had married him, he’d be president of the United States.”
Some people have the ability to bring out the best in others. Maybe Barbara Bush is one of these people, I don’t know. But I do know that this is something all leaders, all parents, all husbands and wives must strive to do: Help others become what they can be.
It’s not always easy helping others develop their potential. Paul compared it to childbirth. He said to the Galatians: “Oh my dear children! I feel as though I am going through labor pains for you again, and they will continue until Christ is fully developed in your lives.” (Galatians 4:19)
When it comes to building others, what’s the difference between inspiring them and nagging them?
Your tone of voice is the first indicator.
The second indicator is the words you choose. Are they accusatory or encouraging? Do they imply doubt or belief in the other person’s ability to reach the goal?
The third indicator is your willingness to hang in there with them. If you’re constantly threatening to withdraw from the relationship, to wash your hands and walk away, you’re not inspiring them — you’re loading them down with guilt.
Paul told the Philippians that he was confident God would finish what he started in them. [Philippians 1:6] Let’s show that same confidence to those whom God has given us to lead.
